I've listened to bees as they rub their knees

And buzz around the garden

Heard piglets belch in perfect Welsh

Never offering a beg-your-pardon

I've sniffed the breath of dirty dogs

Who've eaten garlic sausage

And andouillette in a French baguette

Full of meat and intestinal porridge

I've munched on mould, and edible gold

And plates of fishes fingers

Drunk beer from Bruges and French vin rouge

Where taste on your palate lingers

The ghastly pong of a wrestler's thong

That's left in the laundry for ages

Has filled my nose, like smelly old toes

Or the bottom of parrot cages

I've seen a flea that's lost at sea

And moles without their glasses

And wavering worms that turn and turn

When attending decisiveness classes

I've witnessed cats being chased by bats

Seen lizards eating pasta

Watched chickens fight throughout the night

Over who can lay eggs faster

But all the sounds and smells and sights

I've witnessed with my senses

Do not compare, even should they dare

With Indy's wondrous tresses

As soft as snow, with a flourescent glow

They tumble past his ears

Locks of gold that never grow old

And reduce old ladies to tears

They shine as bright as the stars at night

and lightning (without the thunder!)

They stretch for miles, and when he smiles

We're bathed in joy and wonder.